I've been pretty emotional lately. Not like, "Oh my GOD, the world is so unfair~~~~!" emotional, just I've been feeling a lot of different emotions. I've managed to be happy and sad at the same time. o.o It's scary.
Going to my mom's wedding made me look closer at *why* I feel things, and how I deal with my emotions. My mom and Brian-dad are together almost 24/7. Brian works from home and mom doesn't work, so they see each other every minute of every day, except for times when one of them goes out without the other. (Not very often.) Even though they're always together, they don't ever seriously fight, and they *RARELY* argue.
It kind of made me wonder, how they could stand each other after being together sooooo much. Usually, if you spend too much time with someone-anyone-they'll start to get on your nerves. Even if you love them.
Well, one morning I was talking to my mom and she said something like, "Every day, I choose to love Brian." When she said that, she really made me start thinking.
In high school, (almost) no one forces themselves to stay with someone if they don't "love" them anymore. I mean "love" as in the warm, fuzzy, happy feelings, everything's right with the world, blah blah blah. The crush. When that ends, people wander off to get a new crush. Who'd want to stay with someone after they realized that the person *is* actually a human being, with flaws? It's not a fairy tale romance anymore if they have annoying habits that drive you insane, if they're not quite the nice person you thought they were.
It sounds like I'm accusing everyone of being idiots. Well, I am, myself very much so included. I have been just as blind as everyone else when I "fell in love" with a guy. I have even not listened to my friends when they tried to tell me my boyfriend was a complete jerk. Yeah, I've been a major idiot, but I want to stop being an idiot now.
So, to everybody out there that has romantic feelings for someone else: realize that if you want it to last, you're going to have to *make* it work. Somedays, it'll probably be like trying to force a jigsaw piece to fit in the wrong spot, awkward, uncomfortable, and just wrong. If you struggle through it, you'll have the most beautiful jigsaw puzzle the world's ever seen.
Go for it, everybody, and good luck! ^.^